Sex in the Jungle

One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him and, during her questions about his life, she asked him how he managed for sex. "What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what sex was, and he said, "Oh,Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree."

Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have that all wrong! I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, lay down on the ground, and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, pointing, "You must put it in here."

Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "Why the hell did you do that?"

"Tarzan check for bees!"

Made for each other ;)

The Seven Most Important Men in a Woman's Life

The Seven Most Important Men in a Woman's Life

1. The Doctor - who tells her to "take off all her clothes."

2. The Dentist - who tells her to "open wide."

3. The Milkman - who asks her "do you want it in the front or the back?"

4. The Hairdresser - who asks her "do you want it teased or blown?"

5. The Interior Designer - who assures her "once it's inside, you'll LOVE it!"

6. The Banker - who insists to her "if you take it out too soon, you'll lose interest!"

7. The Primal Hunter - who always goes deep into the bush, always shoots twice, always eats what he shoots, but keeps telling her "Keep quiet and lie still!"

What comes after 69?

Teacher asks girl, "What comes after 69?"
Girl replies, "You rinse out your mouth and wash off your face!"

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of panties?

Q.) Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of panties?

A.) Behind every panty there is a Bush.

How does a cricketer describe a nude woman?

Q:) How does a cricketer describe a nude woman?

A:) No cover, no extra cover, two silly points, two fine legs and a gully.

Don't Worry Be Happy

Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher:
"can kids of our age have kids?"

Teacher replied "NO Never!!"

Boy said to girl :
"see i told you not to worry!!!!".

Whose Wife is Better sex Partner

2 men went 2 a callgirl.

1st went in and came out n said
"Nah my wife is better."

2nd went in and came out n said
"U R right ur wife is much better."

Who is stronger, Man Or Woman?

Q: Who is stronger, Man Or Woman?

A : A woman bcos she lifts
2 mountains on her chest
while a man lifts 2 stones
with the help of a crane

Start your day with a lot of SEX

Always start your day with a lot of S E X

S - SMILE
E - ENERGY
X - XCITEMENT

so make S E X a daily habit,
and youll always B SUCC SEX FUL! in LIFE.

Why are condoms transparent?

Why are condoms transparent?

So that sperms can at least enjoy the scene,
even if their entry is restricted...!